Monday, August 20, 2007

Music: Regina Specktor - Fidelity
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You ever have one of thsoe days where you're just not fit for public? Where you're a little walking ball of hate and even the world's cutest puppy couldn't do anything to help?

Yeah. That was this past Thursday. How many things could have possibly gone wrong that day? Oh man. For starters I didn't know the other secretary wasn't going to be in that day until I got there, so that makes getting lunch a tricky proposition. It also meant I had to stay in the office bored out of my mind until 5 instead of leaving at 3 like I usually do (by 3:00, the menial task of scanning old documents starts to drive me insane). Then the one lawyer who works here started trying to "cheer me up."

A word of advice for all of my friends: If I'm in a shit mood, back away, do other things, and for fucks' sake don't try to "cheer me up." Because if you do this I will feel forced to put on a false facade of being cheerful and that makes the mood even worse. My bad days usually only last one day unless some damned fool tries to "help." Then the hate goes sepctic and I'm a total bitch for at least two more day.

Thursday only got worse when I remembered that my mother really wanted me to go to this Bucknell Alumni of North Jersey event thing at this restaurant in Morristown. I never wanted to go, and in the mood I was in, it was actually a terrible idea for me to go. But frankly, I didn't want to listen to my mother inform me repeatedly for the next several weeks that she was "very disappointed that I chose to skip this opportunity to make new and potentially important connections."

Ya see, my mother was convinced that not only was I going to meet my future husband at this event, but also meet someone who could get me a high-paying paralegal job in the city and get me in to Harvard Law School, LSAT scores be damned. My mother can get really delusional some times, and this is honestly the kind of hope she was pinning on this one evening.

It was a nightmare. I stayed for 20 minute. Everyone there was like 30 or older and there with their spouse, also a Bucknell Alumni. These spousal pairs had clumped together in to manageable groups of 8. There was clearly no place for a 23 year old who had shown up alone. In fact, the only reason I stayed the 20 minutes I did was because it was difficult to get to the door through the crowds of married couples.

WORST. MOOD. EVER.

I went home, told my mom the thing had sucked (she was visably disappointed) and hid in the basement for the rest of the night with my phone turned off.

To emphasize the point of this post, please do not be offended when I don't answer my phone sometimes, my friends. If I go the entire night without picking up, it's probably for the best. I'll be back to my old self as quick as I can so long as I get plenty of isolation and tea.
This transmission logged byErisSaid on 12:21 PM

[web-design by may]